Developing Character #4 - What do you want?

We do the things we do because we get a payoff. If you are still rationalizing or hanging onto what isn't working, ask yourself, what is my payoff? We don't let go because we don't want to do the work to dvelop new behavior patterns. It is easier to hang on to that "gravel pit" instead of turning it into something beautiful.

When you look at a piece of raw exposed ground it is sometimes hard to envision what it would look like if it was turned into a garden. We see the rocks and garbage strewn about and we know we don't want that, but we don't know what we do want either. We complain about all the things we don't like in life, but we seldom take the time to ask ourselves what we do want. What do you want in your marriage? What do you want in your relationship with your mother-in-law, your grouchy neighbor, or your son or daughter? What do you want your writing to accomplish? What do you want to speak about and why? Asking these questions goes beyond the normal reply of "I want to have a happy marriage" or "I want to be a writer or a speaker".

To build a beautiful garden from the gravel pits of our lives, we need to ask:

• What do I really want?
• What do I need to accept and let go of in the process?
• What payoff am I getting for doing nothing?
• What would my life (the garden I want to create) look like? Can I close my eyes and see it?

When you build a house, construction plans are drawn up so the builder has a blueprint to follow. Later, another set of blueprints are needed to design the grounds around the new home. Piles of dirt and rock need to be smothed and piles of building debris removed. Even when the bulldozer levels the ground, it is still barren. You don't want to leave it like it is, but how can you turn it into something inviting and beautiful? Where do you begin?

Years ago, Mrs. Butchart looked at the remains of a quarry from which materials to make cement was extracted. When quarrying was completed what remained was a huge pitted hole; land bruised and ugly. But she "saw" the potential for a beautiful garden. She saw beautiful pathways, shading trees. blooming flowers, defining shrubs and reflective pools. And with the help of landscape architects the internationally famous Butchart Gardens was created, with thousands of people visiting it every year from all over the world.

Our lives often resemble scoured and pitted gravel pits. But from just such environments beautiful gardens are possible. What would you like your "garden" to have; a place to come and rest, a place of beauty, a place to invite others to sit and relax. Allow God to help you define what He wants for you in your life. He will help you let go of what is not needed, bring in what is needed, replace obstacles, and use what appears to be ugly to enhance the landscape. Create a design - a blueprint - for your life. Make it a beautiful garden.

Marlene Anderson, MA, LMHC, NCC

Copyright 2010

Novel Craft Workshop ~ Basics: Preliminary Research

Before we dive into plotting our novels, we need to test the waters. What's the current temperature for novels like yours? It's important to stay up on trends, but I write this with the first-hand knowledge that it's possible to break into print when you swim against the stream. I wouldn't recommend it, though, unless your novel idea, like mine, hounds you to death until you write it. At that point nothing matters so much as getting the thing out of your head and into a coherant form for others to read. If that's the case with you, go for it but understand your book may not see print. In fact, the odds are against it.

You can shorten the odds by working with, rather than against, the market. I don't suggest you write to the latest trend. It takes so long to write a book that you may be left behind as the new wave washes over the beach. So, while it's good to take market trends into consideration, don't stake your career on them. Having said that, however, if you have more than one idea for a novel, you might choose one that looks like a better bet than another. Study trends by following Publisher's Weekly and agent blogs such as those written by Chip MacGregor, Nathan Bransford and Rachelle Gardner. If you know of other resources, please list them in the comments to this post.

Every genere has certain standards considered normal. These aren't set in concrete but until you are established as a writer, you don't want to buck too many of them (again, I have tongue in cheek as I write this). You should at least know what the rules are, wether or not you decide to break them. 

Another type of research, especially if you plan to write historical fiction, involves checking to make sure your story is plausible for the time period. You'll want to gain an overview of the time period you settle on as well. For all types of fiction, sketch a rough map of your setting, look for sites where you might locate some of the action and perform any other story-shaping research now. We'll delve into research in more detail after we have a solid plot.

Action Steps

Subscribe to feeds from Publisher's Weekly and the agent blogs, above.

Put together a list of books available in the genre or type of fiction within which you want to write. As you read them, try to determine what makes them work (and what doesn't). See if you can discover inherant "rules" within your genre. For example, it's considered important in the romance genre for the heroine to meet the hero in the first chapter.

Decide what you need to know before you can plot your book and research only that. Don't get too involved at this point.

Do you have thoughts and/or resources that will help others conduct their preliminary research?


 

The Road to Emmaus

“Now that same day two of them were going to a village called Emmaus, about seven miles from Jerusalem.” – Luke 24:13

Two men walked along the dusty road, mired in the depths of discouragement. They had believed, had hoped, and it seemed that their hope had failed. It was the third day, the day of promise, the day that the Lord Jesus said He would rise from the grave.

Can you hear the despair in their words?

“The chief priests and our rulers handed Him over to be sentenced to death, and they crucified Him; but we had hoped that He was the one who was going to redeem Israel. And what is more, it is the third day since all this took place.” Luke 24:20-21

When all seems lost, when the world looks victorious over the promises of God, when there is no way to reconcile what is seen with what is suppose to be, that is when faith is put on the line and your willingness to believe is tested.

Everyone must walk the proverbial “road to Emmaus.” Everyone must endure times when God’s promises are lost in the current circumstances. Here is where the Lord will meet you, while you walk the road of discouragement.

You won’t recognize Him at first. Wait and listen. He will explain to you the truth just as He did for the two on the road: “And beginning with Moses and the Prophets, He explained to them what was said in all the Scriptures concerning Himself” (Luke 24:27). He may show up in a sermon or He may come to you through the voice of a friend. He may simply guide you to His word and speak to your heart, but one thing is certain: God will reveal the truth.

Then what? What do you do when you finally hear the voice of Christ? What do you do when you are finally pulled out of despair and set right in your heart? You do what the two on the road to Emmaus did: “They got up and returned at once to Jerusalem” (Luke 24:33). Get up and go back to the place where you belong.

Are you on that road right now? Have you experienced a loss of hope? Stop, pray, listen and believe on the Lord Jesus. He has given you no promise that will not come to pass. Just because you don’t see it right now, trust in God that He does not renege on His word.

©2010
Rev. Michael Duncan

Rekindle the Flame

Good campers know that a fire must be stoked to stay alive. Good counselors will tell you that a marriage must be well tended if it is to last. Entrepreneurs will tell you that the market must be watched and models adjusted for the business to thrive.

Writers missed the memo – at least this writer did. Most days I spend my time twisting my brain into unnatural shapes to squeeze out a few sentences. I have to find a way to keep the inspiration thriving in order to keep the solid content flowing.

Simple Tips to Keep Writing

1. Become a Mentor. Mind mind relaxes when I choose to focus on others instead of myself. Sometimes teaching can be the best teacher.
2. Keep the projects moving along. Writing requires developing a habit of consistently writing down words. Too much time off, and the habit is broken. I do better (and can make my family understand) when I HAVE to write because deadlines are looming. Otherwise, I put off doing the things I know I need to do -- can we all say writing that book -- because it does not actually pay me anything. Remember, one excuse is as good as the next so try to eliminate as many as you can from the beginning.
3. Find a mentor. I need someone who can tell me if I am headed in the right direction with my writing or if it is time to make a detour. Writing groups, writing websites and even former English teachers or professors may offer the perfect advice and encouragement to keep the writing going at the right pace.

All relationships die when starved of attention. My relationship with my writing is not immune from the rule. I have to find creative ways to stay in contact with the passion that stirred me to write in the first place.

What do you do to stay motivated and inspired?

Developing Character #3 - Letting Go

We hurt because we don't accept. We hurt because we keep trying to force or manipulate change. We hurt because we repeat the same habitual patterns over and over again, believing that maybe if we try one more time it will work. Acceptance helps us to stop struggling and resisting. Letting go allows us to relinquish things that aren't working in our life. To experience freedom and create meaning, we must "let go" of the past while taking "charge" of the present.

Letting go means

• We remove our masks and become honest with ourselves and others


• I can laugh - I can cry - I can feel my pain - and it's okay


• Transcending my fears: facing death, disability, cancer, hardships, disappointments


• Grieving my losses - to grieve you need to feel and allow expression of those feelings


• Asking for and receiving help


• Acceptance of those things I cannot change - reconciling - coming to terms with what isn't lovely or positive but which are

Letting go doesn't mean you give up. Letting go means you choose to find solutions instead of wringing your hands over the problem. Letting go means you stop blaming others, events, your past, etc. for how you feel and what you can do. Life just is. It's how we choose to respond to it that either liberates us or holds us in bondage. It is much easier to continue to build our grievance stories, find excuses, find someone or something to blame for our lives. Letting go of your past doesn't mean you ignore or deny it; it means you have accepted it and are now ready to make it work for you. You are not your past. But your past is a part of who you are. In spite of what has happened, only you can decide what you will do with it. You can be whole again. Believe it - confirm it every day with positive affirmations.

Let go

• of the need to be right


• of forcing a change


• of the blame game


• of trying to be perfect

In my Relaxation CD, I teach individuals to relax the parts of their body. As you listen to the script and music, you allow yourself to relax as you breathe in and out evenly while slowly releasing tension and stress. So take a moment and relax in a comfortable chair; close your eyes and breathe deeply and evenly and simply "let go" of all that isn't productive; enjoy the wonderful, freeing sensation of watching your stress fade away like so much mist in the sun. Allow yourself to relax in the arms of your Savior.

Marlene Anderson, MA, LMHC, NCC

copyright 2010

Novel Craft Workshop ~ Basics: Setting the Scene

All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players.

~ William Shakespeare

Draw your setting straight from your story's theme. Use contrast or harmony to convey the mood of your story. For instance:

• 
  
  Let's say your main character is a widow who longs to love again but fears letting go of the past as much as she fears loneliness. Your story's mood might illustrate her feelings about the brevity of life. Perhaps she lives on the ocean where she watches vacationing families come and go in summer. This example contrasts the families against our widow's single state. It also offers harmony. The people come but go and the waves wash grains of sand onto the beach and then out to sea in sympathy with the flow of life.
• 
  
  Let's say your main character is a teenage boy consumed with the desire to avenge his father's death in a misguided effort to win back his peace of mind. You'll want a dark mood to reflect his despair and rage. He might live in a concrete jungle where skyscrapers eclipse the sun and the roots of trees crack the pavement beside small squares of ground meant to contain them. The concrete jungle heightens the hard-edged, unrelieved nature of his feelings. Tree roots struggle against the constraints surrounding them as if in sympathy for his true desire for happiness.
• 
  
  If your story is about a young girl who wants to fit into a new school but encounters a bully, you could use a small-town atmosphere where everyone knows one another to highlight the fact that she's a stranger. Perhaps she lives with her spinster Aunt in a farmhouse on the outskirts of town. Each day as she returns home her isolation becomes real.

Deciding the setting for your story is fun. Let your creativity soar. Try on ideas like garments until you find the one that fits best, is the right color and suits your mood.

Action Step

Draw the setting for your book from its theme:

1. 
   
   Identify your main character's main emotions.
2. 
   
   Draw your story mood from a combination of your theme and your main character's emotions.
3. 
   
   Ask yourself which setting might contrast against the mood of your story.
4. 
   
   Ask yourself which setting might best harmonize with the mood of your story.
5. 
   
   Now, decide the details. If your story is set on the ocean, which ocean and where on its coast? Will you use a real location or create one? How familiar will your main character be with his or her setting? The more details you can decide now, the easier you'll make the research stage.

I'll see you back next Tuesday for more about research.

See Your Writing as More

“I want to give you some money for your ministry.”

It took me a second to realize the person was talking to me. No company bears my name. There is no KCL Ministry out there that pays my way or sets my appointments. I am just a writer, struggling to do more with the words that I am able to form on paper.

Or am I? The more I think about the offer the more I understand that my very reaction may have been that thing that has been limiting my ability to do and to be more. My vision must expand in order to become all that God has planned.

Called to Ministry

1. As a writer I am uniquely equipped for ministry. I can share the Word in all of my word formats – and sometimes people may not even realize that is what they are getting until it is too late.

2. As a speaker I can use each opportunity in front of an audience (big or small; Christian or secular) to share the love, compassion and encouragement that the Word has poured into my heart. 3. As a person I walk each day with the chance to show Christ to everyone around me in my actions, my words and my countenance. 4. As a mom I have the obligation to bring up children to understand that purpose is more than a profession – it is a divine appointment.

The money was deposited in my writing account, but I am now calling it my ministry account. I am a writer – but I am a minister.

2 Corinthians 3:16-18; 4:1

16But whenever anyone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. 17Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. 18And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect[a] the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

1Therefore, since through God's mercy we have this ministry, we do not lose heart

It took practice to naturally say the words I am a writer. Accepting that I am a minister, called by God for a particular journey, will take just as much practice. But I know that unless I release those bonds of doubt, I will continue to hold myself, my writing and my impact back from all that has been laid up in store for me.

How do you see your writing? Are you ready to step out in ministry or will you continue just being a writer?

DC# 2 - Acceptance

In order to grow we need to accept where we are and where we have been. When life has hurt us and people have let us down, the wounds can run deep leaving us angry with a desire to strike back, seek revenge or simply walk away and leave it all behind. Yet, we cannot run away from our past nor make a new beginning until we come to terms with it.

In my workshop, "Turn your Gravel Pit into a Beautiful Garden", the first thing I ask participants to do is stop and accept where they are, who they are and where they have been. That is difficult to do, as we usually want to forget our past and move on. In our "gravel pits" are deep gouges in our self-estetem and seeping streams of toxicity that continue to rise to the surface from underground memories contaiminating our current life. We may look at the ugly rocks and boulders strewn in our life story and say there is nothing beautiful there. Yet, those same features that make us feel barren and ugly are the very items that enable us to build something beautiful.

We cannot make the changes we want until we are honest with ourselves and our lives. Acceptance is where we stop struggling, trying to change or alter events. It's where we stop fighting, resisting, denying, minimizing or embellishing events and stop beating ourselves or others up. It is where we stop trying to win the battle with our spouses or children or even trying to be the "good" Christian. It is where we stop trying. Period. Only then will we be able to change directions. Acceptance is a decision we make that allows us to get in touch with feelings we have tried to bury, a past we don't want to acknowledge or a change we are trying to force. It is a place where we rest - to just "be" - instead of "trying to be" somebody or something.

In acceptance

• we no longer try to force a change, but allow a new understanding to guide new choices
• it is where we accept our brokenness
• it is where we stop trying to be perfect and give up trying to be something and someone we are not but have been led to believe we must, should or ought to be
• it is where we acknowledge our need for God
• it is where we can hear our Father's voice tell us He loves us. You can't earn it, you can't buy it, and you can't even understand it. You just accept it and in that acceptance begin to feel loved
• it is where we look at our gravel pits, scarred by rejection, neglect, hatred, nursed grievances, broken homes and marriages, disastrous choices, crimes, lack of discipline, betrayals and broken promises and begin to see the possibilities to create peaceful and beautiful gardens
• it allows for new beginnings

Marlene Anderson, MA, LMHC, NCC

copyright 2010

Squidoo: For Work and Play

Posted by Janalyn Voigt, Author of Novel Books.

Squids, sea-monsters and other distractions by Sheila Deeth

Squidoo didn't used to be so addictive. I'd read a few excerpts of friends' books there, wandered round the odd page, decided I liked blogger better, then made myself a web site. A little while later I was clicking that dreaded "publish" button on Lulu and they brought up a "market your book" link. It seemed like a good idea to follow it, my marketing skills being singularly negligable. Then suddenly, without knowing how, I was creating my first Squidoo "lens." (From Sheila Deeth Blog.)

Novel Craft Workshop ~ Basics: Create Fitting Characters

Who are all these people, anyway? You, the author, must answer this question for the characters you introduce into your story. The process of discovery consumes mental energy and might require you talk to yourself or stare into space -- just another job benefit for a writer.

You can use your story problem and theme as shortcuts to flesh out your characters. You'll need to define your character's setting, background, belief system, appearance, quirks, desires and fears, all based upon the focus of your story. The following tools, which I'll illustrate below, can help:

• Contrast: Black just looks blacker next to white.
• Emphasis: All black can make us forget white exists.

Setting 

• Contrast: If your story is about a grieving widow afraid to trust, perhaps she isolates herself in a community of young marrieds. The glaring differences between her lifestyle and her neighbor's serves to highlight her loneliness.
• Emphasis: Perhaps this widow carries on an uneasy truce with a stray cat that wanders onto her isolated farm. 
• Contrast: A teenage boy who longs to revenge his fathers' death lives in an Amish community. 
• Emphasis: This teenage boy lives in a ghetto rife with gang violence. 
• Contrast: A young girl afraid of rejection enrolls in a parochial school with a tight-knit social structure that excludes her.
• Emphasis: This young girl enters a school for students who don't fit into the school system.
 
Background
 
• 
  
  Contrast: The grieving widow afraid to trust was once a counselor for rape victims.
• 
  
  Emphasis: This widow had an alcoholic father.
• 
  
  Contrast: The vengeful teenager was once an altar boy.
• 
  
  Emphasis: This teenager was once beaten by the father he wants to revenge.
• 
  
  Contrast: The young girl afraid of rejection bullied others in her previous school.
• 
  
  Emphasis: Her parents took the young girl out of her old school because a bully wouldn't leave her alone.

Belief System 

• 
  
  Contrast: The grieving widow thinks that finding love again would only bring someone else into her loneliness.
• 
  
  Emphasis: This widow believes remarrying would betray her deceased husband.
• 
  
  Contrast: The vengeful teenager thinks peace will come from revenge.
• 
  
  Emphasis: This teenager believes he'll never find peace again.
• 
  
  Contrast: The young girl thinks she's not as important as others.
• 
  
  Emphasis: The young girl believes others don't matter.

Appearance

• 
  
  Contrast: The grieving widow has a sultry appearance.
• 
  
  Emphasis: The grieving widow looks like a nun.
• 
  
  Contrast: The vengeful teenager resembles an altar boy.
• 
  
  Emphasis: The vengeful teenager looks like a rebel.
• 
  
  Contrast: The young girl looks like a cheerleader.
• 
  
  Emphasis: The young girl has frizzy hair, zits and glasses.

Quirks

• 
  
  Contrast: The grieving widow watches her neighbors as they come and go.
• 
  
  Emphasis: This widow keeps her blinds shut tight, even when the sun shines.
• 
  
  Contrast: The vengeful teenager cries over movies.
• 
  
  Emphasis: This teenager cuts off other people in traffic.
• 
  
  Contrast: The young girl wants to fit in but doesn't respond when others approach her.
• 
  
  Emphasis: This young girl talks too much when she gets nervous.

Desires and Fears

• 
  
  Contrast: The grieving widow longs to love again but is afraid to trust.
• 
  
  Emphasis: The grieving widow wants to be left alone even while she fears becoming a hermit.
• 
  
  Contrast: The vengeful teenager seeks revenge but fears his softer side.
• 
  
  Emphasis: This teenager is afraid his desire for revenge will make him a monster.
• 
  
  Contrast: The young girl wants to fit in but fears the demands of popularity.
• 
  
  Emphasis: The young girl's fear of rejection thwarts her desire to fit in.

Action Step

This week, outline at least the major characters in your book using the categories and the tools I've illustrated. I suggest you use a spreadsheet or keep a notebook with notes for each character. Otherwise, you'll find yourself hunting back through your book for these details.

If you think of a category I missed, please leave a comment.

©2010 Janalyn Voigt ~ All rights reserved.

DC #1 - Finding Ourselves in the desert

God brought the people of Israel out of Egypt and took them into the desert where He taught them how to live. It is in the desert of our souls that we discover who we are. Periodically life places us in deserts - barren places. It is there we have an opportunity to reflect and grow.

What does it mean to grow? As we watch children grow, we see physical changes as well as the development of their minds; how to reason and think. Over the course of childhood, information is put in place to help us understand and live. We develop beliefs about who we are and how we fit into the world. These usually become rigid and inflexible and are accepted as truth. They are full of shoulds, musts and have to's that demand obedience without question. They are usually full of misinformation and emotionally laden. Yet they drive our thinking, emotional responses and behaviors - usually without our conscious awareness.

Growth is taking what we have and expanding it. When we exercise in the gym, we develop muscle tissue. When we read the bible, we develop our spiritual tissue. When we continue education of any kind, we are able to expand our knowledge base, clarifying and correcting as well as adding new information. It is in that expansion that we grow and develop character. Irrational beliefs can be challenged. We exchange rules for principles.

"Self" work is not about focusing on how good you are. It is about growing and developing character. Self work is answering the qustion, "Who am I today, as a child of God?" And "What does that mean as a parent, a friend, a writer or a speaker." It is both challenging and clarifying misinformation about our past. It is acceptance of our strengths as well as our weaknesses. It enables us to focus on developing our skills and talents, using them without constantly questioning their validity.

In the desert, the people of Israel discovered some hard truths about themselves. Suddenly the life they led as slaves in Egypt did not seem as bad as the austerity and harshness of the desert. Yet, it is where God met them, daily, and taught them how to be His people. And it is where God meets us. Like the people of Israel, we may want to run back to the life we thought we wanted to escape. But it is in the desert where we not only learn about God, but learn how to accept ourselves.

Growth and maturity require facing our fears, our denials, our inabilities and false identities. It is acceptance and in that acceptance knowing that we have new choices. In acceptance, we no longer struggle over what we have to be, we allow ourselves to be. In acceptance we can be honest and we stop running away from our pain, our problems, and our disappointments. We stop hating ourselves or chastising ourselves. Acceptance allows you to look at new options and make new choices. As writers, we are developing more than just our stories; we are developing ourselves.

Marlene Anderson, MA, LMHC, NCC

copyright 2010

Novel Craft Workshop ~ Basics: Story Problem & Theme

We must have a theme, a goal, a purpose in our lives. If you don't know where you're aiming, you don't have a goal. ~ Mary Kay Ash

Substitute the word "books" for "lives" in the above quote. Without a clear theme a book wanders aimlessly through its settings. It might entertain, but it won't linger on in the reader's memory or impart anything of lasting value. A good theme will resonate with readers as it drives your plot. First identify your story problem, and then draw out the greater question behind it. That question is your theme.

A story problem consists of the following elements:

• Desire -- What does your main character want? This desire drives the plot toward a specific goal.
• Problem --  A shift or change in your protagonist's life causes a problem.
• Cost or risk -- What will the solution cost? What are the risks?
• Solution -- How will your story resolve? Will your main character realize his or her goal -- or not?

Examples

Story Problem: A grieving widow longs to find happiness again (desire). When a suitor presses her with his attentions (problem), she must let go of the past (cost or risk) in order to realize her goal (solution).
Theme: Is it possible to find happiness by letting go of the past?

Story Problem: A teenage boy whose father was murdered wants to make sense out of his father's death (desire). When he discovers the identity of his father's killer (problem), he must set aside his desire to seek revenge (cost or risk) in order to forgive (solution).
Theme: Does revenge make sense of murder?

Story Problem: A young girl who wants to fit in (desire) encounters a bully in a new school (problem). When she faces her fear and confronts the bully (cost or risk), she discovers the bully's cowardace and gains the respect of her classmates (solution).
Theme: When facing our fears diminish them?

Action Step

Identify the burning message you want your story to convey. Once you do, it's pretty easy to find your story problem. Give some thought to the greater question you will answer. State it, and you'll have found your theme. As a bonus, you can use your story problem as the foundation for your pitch sentence (more on that in a later workshop).

Next week we'll cover how to develop characters to fit your theme. If you have suggestions or questions, feel free to comment.

Design Tips from a Website Beginner

Computers and I have agreed to disagree. More than once I have been told "your computer is not supposed to do that," and more than once I have managed to make it do things that leave the experts scratching their heads. But I am a DIYer by nature. I love to get in and do things myself - which is probably why I end up putting my computer in so many unpredictable situations.

My DIY projects began when I was only seven. My mother decided to wallpaper the hall. I used her distraction to snag a nice piece of wallpaper for myself, along with some glue. Normal kids might have used it on their closet, or in the hideout under the stairs. My victim made the mistake of taking that moment to walk through my back yard. I still wonder if that poor turtle has that awful, flowered print on his back.

The website that I had was slapped up about the same way that wallpaper had been. It was just good enough to be called a website, but not good enough to add another plank to my platform. I have spent the last several days trying to tweak the design and finding new ways to make contacting (and recognizing me) a little easier.

My Beginning Website Tips

1. Invest in a "for Dummies" type book on HTML and website design. The local library may even have some that you can borrow. You can use them to understand basic coding and make your website more you.


2. Find a program that will let you flip between WYSIWYG and HTML – it will help you see what you are doing with all that crazy code!


3. Develop some friendships with folks that actually understand computer programming, but do NOT take advantage of that friendship. Most people will offer tips and advice, but put work into discovering for yourself.


4. Make backups – and do it often. You will likely make a mistake or two when you are doing it yourself. Plan ahead and always save before you try something new!


5. Keep trying. Even if you never want to become a master or design your own site, taking the time to learn the fundamentals will help you work with a website designer to create an amazing website to help you build your platform to where you want to take your writing.

What do you think? Is my website working out? Would you take on a DIY project or would you prefer to let the experts bang it out?

Developing Character

Do you love and accept yourself as God loves and accepts you? Are you as compassionate and loving to yourself as God is to you? I believe Satan loves to use our negativity so he can create a sense of worthlessness and helplessness that can keep us locked in fear and anxiety eventually leading to a self-fulfilling prophecy of defeat. When we allow ourselves to hide behind a false self, we are not exhibiting the love God has for each of us.

I believe God is calling each of us to be leaders. Through our writing we become "speakers" exclaiming God's love for us. To write and "speak" effectively requires following Him in truth and honesty. Unless we explore and challenge negative thinking and core beliefs within us, our message can become shallow and rhetorical.

The next series will be on Developing Character and will focus on challenging negative thinking and negative beliefs, replacing them with positive God-given affirmations. Challenging a negative thought means, "Where is the evidence to prove that is so? and Who said that is true - what is the source from which it came?" Most of our core beliefs are put in place when we are children growing up and are based on incomplete or erroneous information; yet we act upon those beliefs as if they were truth. Challenging them puts them in proper perspective. When we understand the source, we can accept that they are only a part of who we are and replace them with the freeing love of God. We can love ourselves because God loves us.

How often we exchange one mantle for another - from the world to the church. We exchange one set of rules for another. In both, we are not good enough. In the secular world, we buy into an image that says we have to be a certain way, perform a certain way, etc. In the religious world we beat ourselves up because we are not perfect enough for God. We confess our sins to a loving God, but still don't grace ourselves with that love.

God's love is endless - boundless - nothing you can do can make Him hate you. Yet we often hate ourselves and Satan loves to use that hatred to keep us from living a life of freedom in Christ, unable to be the leaders He calls us to be.

Writing is more than observing the proper mechanics of sentence construction, etc. Unless our writing reflects the understanding of a redeemed heart, our words will just be words. Unless we rejoice in who we are, children of God, instead of constantly reviewing our unworthiness, our writing, as ourselves, will not be genuine. We become genuine in His love and grace.

Marlene Anderson, MA, LMHC, NCC

copyright 2010